Last night, the city of Houston had a controversial, yet hilarious visitor (just like I like them). The always outspoken Ann Coulter made her way to Houston for the first time to speak at an event at Houston Baptist University. Accompanying her was radio host Hugh Hewitt, and what follows is my humble account of the evening.

The evening began with an official from HBU making the usual introduction while the guests of honor waited backstage. He also made sure to point out that Ann got more applause than Mr. Hewitt, to which I could hear her replay favorably, although I didn’t quite get her words.

Then Mr. Hewitt took the stage for a brief introduction and  a poignant summary of recent political events. What stuck most in my mind was his analysis of Hillary Clinton’s performance at the previous night’s Democratic debate in which she said something to the effect of “I didn’t take a position on Keystone until I took a position on Keystone.” Mr. Hewitt then equated this to John Kerry’s assertion that he voted for the Iraq War before he voted against it and gave a thoughtful analysis.

Then Ann took the stage to a standing ovation, and despite my shin splints, I joined in. It was surreal to see the woman from the book jackets and television appearances a few feet away. She looks even taller and thinner in person. She did her opening speech much as Mr. Hewitt did, and it was very much like her hilarious column, except it was live.

I don’t recall the entirety of the evening, even though it was last night, but the highlights included:

• Ann equating immigrants who enter the country illegally to have a baby and get the entire family citizenship to “a game of Red Rover with the border guard.”
• Hugh Hewitt enthusiastically endorsing Ted Cruz for president, and getting Ann to admit he was her second choice.
• Ann offering to take 10 to 1 odds that Trump would be the Republican nominee. (At this point in time it’s hard to disagree, but with those odds: I will take $100 of that action, Ms. Coulter!).
• If and when Trump gets the nomination, who should be his running mate? Ann wants Mitt Romney.
• The patient moderator allowing Ann and Hugh to argue over what Republicans must do to win the 2016 presidential election. He thinks they should appeal to Hispanics. If Ted Cruz and George W. Bush can get 40% of the Hispanic vote, why should other Republicans do the same. She thinks Republicans should appeal to white voters, since they block vote less. After all, if it’s okay to pander and ask the Hispanic community for votes, why can’t they do the same for white people (this got one of the largest rounds of applause of the night). Ann also pointed out that 40% is a loss, and it takes at least 51% to win.
• Ann went on to point out that given last night’s Democratic debate in which every candidate attacked the NRA, the Dems can and do win elections just by firing up their own base as if “they don’t care if one gun owner votes for them.”

After the event, Ann took to the lobby to sign copies of all of her books, including “Adios America” (my review of which is coming soon). Without giving away boring details, I ignored the shin splints and rushed to the table to take my place in line.

After watching her hesitation at a previous event in hugging an audience member who had a question, I was scared she wouldn’t want to shake hands. But she did, and gave me a big smile to boot. She couldn’t have been more gracious if she was from Houston itself, and was super cool about spelling my name correctly on the autograph I got – and even complimented my name – which I received in honor of my Mexican grandmother.

She was also SUPER-COOL when I gifted her my humble indie book, and while I was scared she may refuse for many wonderful reasons, she thanked me and is (hopefully) soon to be Ordinance 93’s newest fan!

In short, thanks so much Ann Coulter and Hugh Hewitt for coming to Houston! Ya’ll come back now, y’hear!
Lilia Fabry is the author of Ordinance 93, a novel set in a world where having a baby without permission is against the law and the first four people to break it. She also writes about everything from reaction injection molding to low fat recipes while indulging her need for creative outlets including novels and screenplays. Find out more on Twitter.